I'm finding it interesting the way that our experiences can change us as people. Parts of our personality we assumed were fundemental can just dissapear and the results can be interesting new experiences. I have alot of fears and alot of reservations especially related to safety and the possibility of accidents in any situation. So this trip is quiet a huge "cornerstone" for me into lightenting up and being set free of some of my quiet debilitating fears.
There are also always those smaller, silly reservations we have, a few of which I have overcome:
1) Showering - I love showers, everyday and most days twice a day. However when you are on the road in a caravan thats not always a possibility nor a priority... Even Brent cannot believe I went a day without a shower haha.
2) My bike being broken - Brent didnt attach the rack for my bike properly on the back of the van so when we set of from the central coast the entire rack spun around, ended up upside down and my bike dragged along the road for anywhere up to 70 kilometres of freeway. Usually this sort of thing would leave me very stressed but for some reason I just could not stop laughing, it would have looked ridiculous, there would have even been sparks because the tyre was ground away and the rim was half ground away hah. I suppose I'm just more relaxed when were trekking.
3) Claustrophobic situations - going into an underground mine shaft was somthing I never thought I would even come close to doing, even an under "building" simulate one, but I stepped inside and shut the door behind me. Granted - I stayed very close to the door but still, this was quiet a hurdle for me. Maybe I'll be spulunking through tight caves soon? hah!
4) walking through dark caravan parks late at night alone - I have become somewhat co-dependent with Brent. Perhaps even afraid of the dark! Especially iin random towns I dont know anything about! However last night I umped up, put my jacket on and went for a little walk through the van park and down to the amenities block. I dint even continuously check behind me and freak out. I just walked casually then walked back to the van. It felt lovely.
Even though these growth experiences may seem silly to others they were small things that really held me back. I think every little tiny step is so important when your working on self development so I feel really grateful that I was able to push my own limits and evolve as a person. All these tiny steps will add up and by the end of the trip maybe I will be far less nervous than I am now days. :-)
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